is it TRAUMA??

I was trying to explain to my therapist that maybe I was self-diagnosing too much from tiktok things I'd seen, and I think she kind of understood (she said it like it happened a lot amongst medical students) but it's hard to explain - right now for example I read about how someone was being a cycle breaker, someone else said they finally realized how wonderful their parents are, and then I saw something about an autistic experience of being punished for "speaking out" trying to ask clarifying questions and my brain made a zap - did that happen to me? Is THAT why my mind completely blanks when I'm asked if I have questions? I certainly don't remember, I was a "good kid," so I'm wondering if it happened at home or at church? Maybe I just learned very early, very hard, not to rock the boat and that's why I've been so good at being quiet, observing, masking. 

OR maybe I'm just quiet and I've watched too many tiktoks about childhood trauma?? It's hard to say!

(On an unrelated note I'm having a pretty good mental day! Hooray! It won't tie into productivity because I'm still recovering from illness but I'm okay with that! I deserve rest!)