still sad

I've felt a lot of other feelings... mostly tired, but not all downers. I think it will be fun... once we leave. For now I just feel SO tired. I... how else do I feel? What words can I use? I feel heavy, I feel helpless like no one really wants to get ready to go, they just want the fun. Like I'm the only one pulling the weight. I feel like that a lot. And it's exhausting. My youngest is still at the age when I'm her best friend which is SO adorable but also so exhausting. I too would like the fun without the work.